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Since returning from my trip to the Gambia I have done some research into the country, the people, the way of life and the reality of Gambian men. After experiencing first hand what it can be like to be ‘wooed’ by Gambian men, I have done a lot of reading around the subject. I have also had contact with hundreds of women who feel that they have been treated badly by Gambian men (see comments at the end of this post).
My personal experience with Gambian men
I am by no means an expert with regards to Gambian men.
In fact, I’m glad that I’m not! Because it sounds like most people who are knowledgeable in this field are actually the ones who have been cheated on, experienced fraud or who have been used as a meal ticket for a British visa….
But just to give this post a bit of context, here is my personal experience in brief:
I made a ‘friend’ in The Gambia who became a little too friendly. After declaring his love continuously for my friend whilst in the country (and did not get the response he was looking for) he proceeded to do the same with me.
He then began asking me for money, time and time again. He would continuously call me via Skype after I returned home. He continued to tell me that ‘he loved me’ over and over again. When I stopped answering his calls on Skype he would Facebook message me.
It took about three years (this man was persistent!), but eventually he stopped trying to contact me. I now have limited [update-no] contact with him.
The reality of Gambian men: Real examples
In my previous post on sex tourism in The Gambia, I discussed how many (often of an older age) women appear to travel to the Gambia in search of a young, fit African man. The benefit to the Western woman here being clear. However my research has shown that the benefits for the men far outweigh those to the women.
When looking, there are literally hundreds of stories on the internet written by predominantly English women. I found this extremely shocking, whilst insightful to read. Here is a summary of some of the things I read:
- Gambian men declaring their love for Western women when they have a Gambian wife and kids
- Gambian men introducing their ‘sister’ to the Western girlfriend/wife when in fact it is their Gambian wife
- Gambian’s marrying the Western woman to get a British passport then when reaching England disappearing never to be seen again
- Gambian men that serial date- they are being named and shamed on the internet!
- The men pray 5 times a day in attempt to make up for all the wrong they are doing by serial dating/having multiple wives etc (perhaps opinion rather than fact)
- On average Gambian men have 1.6 wives
- On average Gambian men have 8.4 children, whereas Gambian women have 6.4
These examples are not isolated cases, there are so many examples of this on the internet, and what’s funny is that many of the stories quote things that the men have said to them, and they all say things that I have myself heard from Gambian men! Some of these stories many can be found on the Naming and shaming Gambian ‘love cheats’.
I would like to point out that this information is all gathered from research and not my personal experience. I would also like to say that I am not by any means saying this is the case for all Western/Gambian relationships. I am simply sharing information that I was very shocked to read.
*New for 2019*
I have done some extensive research into this, and wow(!), there are so many stories of women who have been cheated by these, so called, ‘Gambian love-cheats’! I have put some of this research together for you in a helpful guide, with 10 tell-tale signs, based on real examples, that your man might not be entirely legit! You can download the Quick Stop Guide to Determine if The Man You are Dating is a Gambian Love-Cheat here.
If you have any similar or contradictory experiences I would love to hear then-please comment below!